hey sorry for writing a blog after a long time the reason is that may be these days i dont define in btw what to do or what to do not?nways its gud that i m here bcoz i cant bugg the ppl all the time n make them listen to me with full concentration and concern....i dont knw why these days i use this word call ''concern ''bcoz i never find any one who is actually "concerned" with me all the time means watever i feel like talking and sharing some one cant hear me all the time everyone has his or her own life and a lot of things and joys rather than to listen to me which is just like to take a pill of ''DEPRESSION'' so i shouldnt aspect anything frm anyone right a way i should stop giving others a pill of depression.there are lots of things which i want to write i dnt knw from where to take a start but i m writing its just its again a mess in my already messy life i dnt knw y i awalys things abt y there is a glass on the table or y there is no water to drink etc these are just the examples .I think i shouldnt think too much but how can i always denny whenever my mind raise a question that ''y there is no one to take care of me'' y i wept alone for hours y no one have time to listen n own my depression ''y'' u knw i m all hallow its just bcoz i find the losted mother's love in every single relation whether its my frnds or anyone close to me i always feel like pampered .ohh i have just talked to amna mashal's lil sis nshe told me that mashal will come ack after one year i m feeling so scared of it yar how i m gona survive n y this happens to me whenever i come close to anyone that person went away y man ?y all the time this happens to me i dnt want to live in this ITSS ALLAH cant u do something cant u stop mashal going to canada u can do everything u can make reasons.i wish her best n want the best for her but i dont want her go away ....I m feeling a strong headache n i just want myself to be invinsible right now i just want to go somewhere else than this office n else than my home ....where i knw no one ...i dnt knw y i m living y i m breathing .......



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i need to take a long breath
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i m suffocated...

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i m sick...

i need a physcarist
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i need to die....


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where ppl cant hurt me ,,cant leave my hand..

i dnt knw ALLAH wat u have planned for my death but i want it in my own way cant u let me die while offering a poraying in khana kaba
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i always thank u whenever u blessed me
n i have to

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but listen i dnt have anyone else than ''YOU'' to ask for thing from a toothbrush to a cellphone
u have to manage all the things for me as u do n no doubt u are doing it very well i dont have to beg frm any one of ur ppl for anything i want
i just have to raise my hands to the max height i can...
...
n just have to say ALLAH u have to do this for me as u always do '''
i knw i m nothing i m very bad @ my religion n believes but u r the best u r the greatest u r the GOD ,u r the rehman ,the reheem ,the one who always gives,always forgives,
always bless ,always listen

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listen to me plz

i m again in this transs

cant u make me emotionaly stable
strong enough to keep something in my heart n mind n not to tell every single person around
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i want to pray with full concentration

i need the peace
i need u

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thx for being there for me throughout all the nights n days of my life i use to talk to u whever iwant to n u knw wat i cant hear ur reply but i can feel the peace n love that i m listened i m loved its u i luv u my ALLAh

N PLZ BLESS MY FAMILY
I M going to be a khala
i want a health n lucky baby boy for my sister
plz bless her with that
n of a long life
i want lots of happiness ,peace n weath for my family
n my father give them that
give waseem the best salaried job
n a long n healthy life
..
n give heaven to my late mom,my grand parents n the one for whom there is no one to pray after his or her death i m here to pray for those plz listen to me..

i know u have all the powers all the ways

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n plz do love me more than ur ppl
u knw 71 mothers wala formula
lol

i need u //
luv u ALLAH